Checking in on Perfectionism
I heard the quote, “Perfectionism is a sexy word for insecurity” two weeks ago and it’s still on my mind.
Am I still a perfectionist? What do I gain from identifying as a perfectionist?
If there are no negative consequences, am I really a perfectionist? Maybe I just really care about details?
Definition (Merriam-Webster): a disposition to regard anything short of perfection as unacceptable where perfection is defined as freedom from fault or defect.
From Psychology Today:
Perfectionism is a trait that makes life an endless report card on accomplishments or looks. When healthy, it can be self-motivating and drive you to overcome adversity and achieve success. When unhealthy, it can be a fast and enduring track to unhappiness.
What makes extreme perfectionism so toxic is that while those in its grip desire success, they are most focused on avoiding failure, resulting in a negative orientation. They don’t believe in unconditional love, expecting others’ affection and approval to be dependent on a flawless performance.
Last September I gave a session, Overcome the Perfection Trap, and I’ve made considerable progress since then. Below are a few thoughts:
Nothing is perfect
No one I know thinks, “I’d really like to be judged more.”
You are Good Enough exactly as you are, in this moment and always
The most important judge is me and I celebrate what is!
I hope checking in on perfection helps all of us continue to celebrate our progress and accept what is.
Previous posts on perfection:
Perfectionism Resources (includes a summary from my Overcome the Perfection Trap session)
